"Yog li kev sib tw …" croaks charter qhua Steve Bradley, thaum nws funnels ib chunk ntawm wagyu cia nws qaug cawv gullet. Cov neeg ua haujlwm hauv lub lawj thiab sab hauv yog frantically sim npaj ib qho kev ua npuas ncauj ua npuas ncauj, raws li Steve stumbles los ntawm lub rooj noj mov. "Cov zaub mov zoo tshaj plaws uas kuv tau muaj!" nws tshaj tawm - "lub sij hawm rau ua npuas ncauj tog!". Nws zoo nkaus li nws suab: bloated los ntawm cov nyiaj seem, charmingly sauced. Nws stumbles mus rau lub siab phem tshaj plaws saib ua npuas ncauj tog nyob rau hauv keeb kwm ntawm ua npuas ncauj tog, tag nrho cov tuaj koom: ob tug neeg coob coob. Tsis pub dhau lub vib nas this ntawm zawv zawg los ntawm pob taws pob taws sib sib zog nqus, Steve tau tso tseg nws tus kheej, mus rau qhov thib peb stew, Rocky, "Koj puas yog ib leeg?" nws dribbles, raws li nws cia li NW nyuam qhuav swoops tawm ntawm nws tuav. Tsuas yog lwm hnub tsis tu ncua ntawm SS Excess uas nyob hauv qab Deck, tab sis cia siab rau peb thaum peb hais, nws yeej tsis yog qhov phem tshaj.
Nws tau tsib lub caij ntawm Hauv Qab lawj, peb lub caij nyoog ntawm spinoff Hauv qab lawj Mediterranean, thiab ib lub caij ntawm Hauv qab lawj: Sailing Yacht thiab lub franchise yog npaj los khob Cov Niam Tsev ntawm nws lub pedestal. Txawm hais tias qhov yeeb yam yog qhov tseem ceeb ntawm nws cov kwv tij Bravo, nws muaj ob qhov sib txawv sib txawv mus rau nws: crud strumpets thiab thoob khib nyiab heaps.
Rau cov tsis tau pib, qhov kev zov me nyuam (hais 'pro-grim') yog nyob rau pem hauv ntej, pem hauv ntej tab sis ntub. Lawv yog cov nkoj, cov thoob khib nyiab dej hiav txwv, thiab xav tau mermaids sim ua lawv lub neej zoo tshaj plaws, yog tias lawv lub neej zoo tshaj plaws yog Universal Studios Waterworld stunt ua yeeb yam uas thawb lawv lub puab tsaig-ua haujlwm dav hlau-ski rau kev ywj pheej. Qhov tseeb, qhov kev txiav txim siab tom ntej rau feem ntau ntawm cov cuab yeej sib deev no yog cov gills loj hlob, thiab tig ntses ua kom yuam kev hauv qab dej ua ntej nws thiaj li tig mus rau pob zeb ntawm 5 teev tsaus ntuj Mallorca puam rave. Ua ke nrog lub siab xav kom khiav deb ntawm txhua qhov kev cog lus mus sij hawm ntev, muab pov rau hauv lub koob yees duab cov neeg coob ntawm cov chaw ze heev thiab koj muaj koj cov kua qaub, cua sov, ntsev, tsis muaj rog.
Txawm hais tias cov qhua saum toj saud charter tiag tiag yog hnav khaub ncaws, lawv tseem muaj qhov txawv ntawm Cov Niam Tsev tiag tiag ntawm kev nplua nuj thiab 'tus npau suav' (neeg haus cawv). Yim caum feem pua ntawm cov sij hawm cov qhua no yog qhov koj xav tau (porn influencers), thiab lwm yam nees nkaum feem pua yog qhov phem dua (porn yoga influencers). Thaum ib daim ntawv thov rau cov xim gumballs (tsis muaj xim dawb, vim Yoga Prostitot xav tias nws yog Van Halen - nws yog qhov zoo tshaj plaws, Von Dutch) tau ya mus rau hauv lub nyoob hoom qav taub koj paub tias koj tab tom ntaus qhov kev muaj tiag TV qhov chaw qab zib. Qhov tseeb, Hauv qab Deck zoo li npau suav phem rau peb cov neeg npau suav phem rov qab los rau lawv cov hauv paus: nqaij toads thiab bubblehead waifs, lub sijhawm dhau los ntawm xyoo 2005 kev muaj tiag pov tseg. Lawv thov kom tus npua raug tua tawm ntawm rab phom loj mus rau kab ntawm Go Daddy qauv asses, thiab peb hais tias "muy bueno".
Cov neeg coob tsis yog neeg dawb huv tab sis txawm tias feem ntau, lawv tseem hluas txaus los ua kev sib raug zoo, tus tub puas nyiam kho cov poj niam txiv neej tropes. Lub caij dhau los yog lub koom haum misogyny-fueled machismo cov tub hluas uas ua rau 'Go Daddy Ass Wreckage 5' zoo li Shakespeare. Kev ncig xyuas kev thov txim tom qab tshaj tawm kuj tseem phem dua. Los ntawm lawv tus kheej account, cov txiv neej no yog tiag tiag, tiag tiag sim. Tsis yog tiag, lawv zoo! Koj tsuas yog to taub yuam kev tias lawv txhais li cas thaum lawv hais tias 'qhov kev nthuav dav' xav tau kom nws tau txais qee qhov 'expletive' los yog kuv yuav 'footage redacted'.
Tom qab ntawd muaj cov kws ua zaub mov, uas peb tseem tsis tau kov vim tsis muaj leej twg yuav tsum kov tus kws ua zaub mov. Thiab yog, hauv qhov nruab nrab no, tus kws ua zaub mov yog tus kws ua zaub mov yog tus kws ua zaub mov. Koj puas xav pom tus cwj pwm archetype uas tsis tau hloov ntau txhiab xyoo? Saib tsis ntxiv! Ib tug narcissistic, egotistical txiv neej-me nyuam nrog crippling niam tej teeb meem? Tshawb xyuas! Puas muaj kev npau taws thiab tsis muaj kev sib txuas lus? Tshawb xyuas ob zaug! Manipulative gaslighting tendencies thiab Peter Pan-esque laissez-faire lub hom phiaj? Peb muaj Weiner. Txawm hais tias nws yuav zoo li hnyav, cov txiv neej-ratatouille no ua rau ntau yam ntawm 'ib yam dab tsi hnyav ladled kua zaub pun' ua yeeb yam. Qee tus nyiam dua lwm tus, tab sis cia nws paub: lawv yuav ua kom puas txhua yam. Lub ntug me me yog muab rau hauv qab Deck OG Ben, uas nws lub suab tsuas yog rub nws mus rau hauv qeb ntawm 'scamp' dhau 'scumbag'. Whereas Hauv qab lawj: Med vet thiab Sailing Yacht crossover Adas Glick tswj kom beguile nrog ib qho tsaus nti undercurrent. Peb tsis paub tias nws zais dab tsi, tab sis nws paub tseeb tias nws siv nws lub qhov muag tsis muaj kev sib deev kev foom phem rau kev phem es tsis yog, zoo… sex.
Qhia rau qee qhov kev qhuas qhuas: ntxim nyiam foul- mouthed turd-hlub feminist kiwi icon Aesha Scott. Cov qhua charter uas tau ncaws tawm hauv ntu ib rau kev ua ntau yam tshuaj tam sim ntawd. Rocky tus mermaid phem (slash leej twg xav ua ib tug mermaid). Thiab Brandy, lub cev tsis muaj sia, qaug dej qaug cawv uas yuav tsum tau rub los ntawm pebbleed puam mus rau kws kho mob ua ntej noj su.
Yog tias koj tab tom nrhiav kom nkag mus rau hauv qab Deck, nws raug nquahu kom siv tib txoj kev koj xav tau Bravo behemoth thiab pib qhov kawg thiab ua haujlwm koj txoj kev rov qab. Vim tias nws yog ib qho los saib cov thoob khib nyiab tiag tiag, nws yog lwm qhov los saib tib yam tab sis nrog cov xov tooj uglier.
